Can We Truly Change?
Let's Talk About It.
Hi Voyager,
Our last episode of Behind the Lights Conversations was one for the books and one of the most necessary conversations we’ve had so far.
From lived experiences to patterns we’ve normalized, to the quiet ways pain shapes our reactions, decisions, and relationships, this episode was that call to look inward. And until we become aware of these patterns, we may keep repeating them, without realizing we have the power to change.
As always, we emphasized that at the heart of this podcast is community. Your voice matters here. And from the feedback we’ve received so far, we got two vital questions. Our guest responded and here you go:
Question One: Can people really change or do they just manage their tendencies better once they start therapy?
Answer: Yes, people can. If they are aware that they want to and they do the work that enables the transformation. Change has to happen from within. It is possible, especially if the change is about breaking bad habits, patterns, tendencies, and geared towards evolving. Then yes, that kind of change can happen, but ultimately it depends on the person and the willingness to do the work.
Question Two: How do you know that you are completely healed? How do you figure out that you are not just pushing down the traumas and emotions, instead of healing?
Answer: Healing is usually not fixed. It’s not a straight line, it’s a process. So that phrase completely healed might not just happen, it might take a while, but once you start healing, you would know that you are improving.
The ultimate benchmark for healing is self awareness and transformation. “Am I reacting better?”
“Am I doing this better?
“What did I used to do back then that I’m no longer doing now?”
“How does my mind work?”
Healing is not like just starting something and then you reach the finish line. We all keep getting better. And because life itself is not fixed, something can happen today while you’re on a healing journey, and you have to recover or deal with that. Life in itself is a lifelong lesson.
We continually better ourselves. So healing is not a fixed term unless, of course, you are talking about healing within a particular context.
Have I recovered from this heartbreak? How am I dealing with grief? Am I recovered from depression? How are the anxiety tendencies and things like that?
Yes, those ones have defined benchmarks that you can use to gauge whether or not you are improving.
If there’s anything this episode leaves us with, it’s this:
Healing is possible.
Change is possible.
But it requires awareness, honesty, and the willingness to do the work.
And you don’t have to navigate it alone.
So, Voyager, we’d love to hear from you:
How has this episode spoken to you?
What shifted for you?
What are you unlearning?
Your story and your reflections always matter here.
Kindly share your feedback with us below.
We’re happy to read them all.
In other news, are you ready for episode 4?!
With you on the voyage,
Favour.
❤️❤️